What the World Needs Now ... A Musical Fable. (2024)

(MUSICAL; OLD GLOBE THEATER; 645 SEATS; $39 TOP)

San Diego An Old Globe Theatre and Roundabout Theatre Co. presentation of a musical in two acts with book by Kenny Solms, music by Burt Bacharach and lyrics by Hal David. Directed by Gillian Lynne. Conceived by Lynne, Solms. Musical direction, Alex Rybeck. Orchestrations by Harold Wheeler. Dance arrangements by David Krane. Sets, Bob Crowley; costumes, Gregg Barnes; lighting, Kenneth Posner; sound, Jeff Ladman; stage manager, Julie Baldauff. Opened April 2, 1998. Reviewed April 4. Oliver Running time: 2 Hours, 15 MIN.

Alfie Lewis ClealeJennifer Sutton FosterArnie John BoltonLiz Paula NewsomeThe Other Woman Alicia IrvingTrio Misty Cotton, Alicia Irving, Monica Pege

With: Roxane Barlow, Brendan Byrnes, Jack Donahue, Christianne Farr-Wersinger, Amy Heggins, Jenny Hill, Joanne Manning, Adam Matalon, Rod McCune, Jonathan Sharp, Mark Anthony Taylor, Courtney Young, Lindsay Chambers, Pamela Gold.

Musical numbers: "What the World Needs Now," "Always Something There to Remind Me," "This Guy's in Love With You," "Knowing When to Leave," "I'll Never Fall in Love Again," "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head," "She Likes Basketball Walk on By," "The World Is a Circle Cotillion," "Close to You," "The Look of Love," "You'll Think of Someone," "I Say a Little Prayer," "I Just Have to Breathe," "Alfie," "Paper Mache," "The Balance of Nature," "Don't Make Me Over," "Trains and Boats and Planes," "Wives and Lovers," "Any Old Time of the Day Make It Easy on Yourself," "Denial Ballet," "A House Is Not a Home," "What's New puss*cat?/Wishin' & Hopin', " "One Less Bell to Answer," "Blue on Blue," "Here Where There Is Love," "Anyone Who Had a Heart."

Aiming to celebrate the songbook of pop giants Burt Bacharach and Hal David, the creators of the Gothambound musical "What the World Needs Now" land rather wide of the mark, somewhere in the neighborhood of desecration. With all things swinging '60s currently -- or is it constantly? -- fashionable, Bacharach and David are on everyone's CD players these days, but this show doesn't add any luster to their repolished reputations. Instead it proves that everything hip can be made square again.

Mistake No. 1 is the attempt to weave the songs together with a contemporary book, by the show's coconceiver Kenny Solms, that puts one in mind of the old joke about the restaurant with bad food and small portions. Neither the skimpiness of the writing nor its feebleness can be excused by the show's subtitle, "A Musical Fable." Story runs thus: boy meets girl, boy has intimacy issues, boy loses girl, boy conquers fear of commitment, boy gets girl back. The dialogue mostly consists of small talk laced with a string of psycho-banalities like "I know you've been hurting ... don't shut me out." The primary couple is called Jennifer and Alfie (!), and they're contrasted with best pals Arnie and Liz, whose commitment problems have made a gender switch.

The songs are wedded to the outlines of the plot with a literal-mindedness that's embarrassing. "She Likes Basketball" is danced with the obvious props; "Are You There? (With Another Girl)" involves little mimed scenes of betrayal. Left alone with a chair, Alfie stares at it for a moment, then breaks into "A chair is still a chair ..." (from "A House Is Not a Home"). If it weren't for logistical problems, we might have had "What's New puss*cat?" crooned to a feline.

Attempting to squeeze in virtually every well-known Bacharach-David tune -- the credits list 39 titles -- means that most are thrown in more or less willy-nilly. (Why do we need to hear 30 seconds of "Message to Michael"? Presumably so we can say, "Oh yeah, remember that one?") The plot is picked up and discarded almost as often as the ensemble changes Gregg Barnes' dull, TV variety show costumes. Bob Crowley's handsome set is a skewed jumble of New York landmarks, and the magical way Kenneth Posner's lighting plays across it is the lone bright spot in the show's aesthetic.

The abundance of music would be a bonus if the songs were performed winningly, but here the show makes its most egregious failure, as the pop piquancy of Bacharach's melodies is squeezed into bland showtune arrangements, and all their sweet distinction is lost, just as the hamfisted way they're tied to a plot serves not to add a dimension to David's lyrics, but to take several away.

The performers are generally likable and competent. As Jennifer, Sutton Foster seems to have been told that since she looks like Ally McBeal, she should act like her, too. She has a ringing, slightly nasal soprano that's put to best use on "I Just Don't Know What to Do With Myself." Paula Newsome brings some freshness to her role as the commitment-phobic best friend, while Alicia Irving (as the Other Woman) puts across "Make It Easy on Yourself" with showstopping aplomb. Lewis Cleale's acting and singing as Alfie are pleasant, if generic, while John Bolton lays on the kooky a little thickly as Arnie.

The show's director, co-conceiver (with Solms) and choreographer is Gillian Lynne, who created the dances for such Andrew Lloyd Webber extravaganzas as "Cats" and "Me Phantom of the Opera." The dancing on display here is busy and derivative -- and endless, leaving the audience far too much time to recall all the superior versions of the songs being hom*ogenized in this misbegotten musical: Aretha Franklin's "I Say a Little Prayer," Dusty Springfield's "Me Look of Love," Dionne Warwick's -- well, Dionne Warwick's just about anything. One can only wonder where Warwick's psychic friends were when this assault on the Bacharach-David legacy was being conceived; with psychic friends like those, who needs enemies?